Song #339: "I Honestly Love You" by Olivia Newton-John

Date: Oct 5, 1974
Weeks: 2

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It's nice to finally find a heartfelt song that doesn't allow its production to overwhelm its sincerity.

Listen to those acoustic instruments. And listen to how few of them there are. I hear a piano, some strings, and maybe a little light horn here and there. There aren't even drums trying to force the song into a rock-and-roll mold it doesn't actually fit into. The effect is to emphasize the emotion of Newton-John's performance. It's remarkable what you can do when you just make something classic instead of trying to update it.

And she gives a good performance here. The song is about her admitting her love for someone else and being rejected, and her resigned sadness. And everything about her voice and the music communicates that sadness.

I don't really care for the title. There's something about the words "I honestly love you" that crosses the line into over-earnestness. It's the kind of thing that only gets said in super-intimate settings, when you've already thrown out "I love you" a bunch and need to say "no, really, I'm not just saying it, I honestly love you." And that's fine in that setting, but in this context it feels more like she's throwing it around just for emphasis rather than for the word's actual meaning. Might as well say "I literally love you."

My verdict: Like it. Frankly, I'm just happy to find a song that didn't sap away its emotional meaning with poor instrumental choices. Now I have an example to point to. But also it successfully communicates a feeling, which is the mark of successful art.

Song #652: "Seasons Change" by Expose

Date: Feb 20, 1988
Weeks: 1

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I know I've said this several times before, but I really wonder who it was that thought mixing cheap synthesizers with heartfelt emotional songs was a good idea. Because this song isn't so bad, but some terrible choices were made in its construction.

And it's not like you can't make interesting music with synthesizers. Expose's own earlier song "Point of No Return" is a fine song and it has the same poundy drum and synthesized tones. But because it's more upbeat and poppy, it works in a way that the same synthesizers don't work here. Also, that blaring 80s saxophone is really overbearing here.

Lyrically, it's about the sadness of a relationship that hasn't stood the test of time. I sort of like the lyrics. Lines like "It's been so long since I found you yet it seems like yesterday" have a simple poetry to them. The singing is also pretty good. The lead singing and the backing harmonies try their hardest to convey the emotions expressed by the lyrics, but they just can't penetrate the thick wall of the synthesizer.

My verdict: Don't like it. The synthesizer is just too overbearing.

Remake-off: Song #83: "Go Away Little Girl" by Steve Lawrence vs. Song #260: "Go Away Little Girl" by Donny Osmond

Date: Jan 12, 1963
Weeks: 2

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 vs.

Date: Sept 11, 1971
Weeks: 3

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Both incarnations of this song have so many problems that I'm at a bit of a loss for where to even begin. I suppose the fundamental problem is the same: it's a a cowboy-sounding ballad with way too much going on in what could otherwise be a charmingly simple song.

Lawrence's version starts out okay, sounding like he's settled on a song that should be sung by a cowboy as his horse strolls down the dusty trail. But then for some reason the sound mix throws in a second track where he harmonizes with himself. And then a string section comes in, which makes it feel less like a cowboy sing-along and more like a cowboy movie. Which wouldn't be all bad, but I don't think the song is aiming for cowboy movie chic.

Osmond's version, oddly, maintains a lot of that same cowboy western sound. The horse-hoof clopping sound has been toned down a bit, but in its place is an unwelcome backup chorus, and a much larger backing orchestra. And Osmond's vocals are unrefined. When he reaches for those upper notes, you can hear him straining. I suppose that's why they added the backup chorus, so he wouldn't have to do quite so much.

The lyrics bug me, but for different reasons. The song is about the singer feeling tempted by the "little girl," but not wanting to be unfaithful to the relationship he's in. And so he begs her to "go away." "You're much too hard to resist," he says. He's not quite blaming her for his attraction to her, but it's close enough to make me uncomfortable.

And then we have the diminutive "little girl" problem. Steve, if that girl is so "little," you probably shouldn't be tempted by her in the first place. Either she's a woman and the issue with your attraction is that you're seeing someone else, or she's underage and that's the problem with your attraction.

That's less of a problem for Osmond, who is about 14 here, but sounds like he's all of 10. "Little Girl" is a bit more appropriate when sung by a little boy. But then the rest of the lyrics start to seem inappropriate. "I know that your lips are sweet." You do? How do you know that? "When you're near me like this you're much too hard to resist." That's an understandable line coming from a grown man, but from a boy it sounds like he's repeating something he heard without knowing what it means. And I suppose that feeling is enhanced by the fact that he's doing a cover.

My verdict: Don't like it. I don't like either one, but Steve Lawrence's version is better. Donny Osmond's voice just isn't ready yet for this. He did mature into a much better performer eventually, though.

Song #816: "MMMBop" by Hanson

Date: May 24, 1997
Weeks: 3

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Much like "Sugar, Sugar" (#219), a song with the title "MMMBop" could only be the most sugary, empty-calorie, for-teenagers-by-teenagers pop song you could imagine. And yet. While it's fairly successful on that level, there's something more to this one.

The thing this song brings to the table is sincerity, which is both its greatest strength and its greatest weakness. The lyrics are about how painfully brief people's relationships can be, and how it's impossible to predict which relationships will last, and that it's important to hold on to the people who really care about you because those are the relationships that will last. The notion of familial love over romantic love is an usual one for teenagers to sing songs about. And yet that's exactly why the song is so odd. Because it winds up feeling like you're listening to an 11-year-old lecturing you about things he doesn't completely understand yet. Meanwhile, the chorus is "MmmBop. Ba daba doo-wop."

The lead vocals are also painfully sincere. It's a 14-year-old, whose voice is still in the middle of changing, trying to sing as intensely as he can, in as high a pitch as he can still manage. Strained doesn't begin to describe it. This strained sound also makes the lyrics difficult to comprehend. However, you can't deny his enthusiasm, and that's where the vocals are redeemed. He's going for it, and he doesn't care.

Musically, you can't beat the overall tone. The lead and bass guitars are particularly nice all throughout. This is just a fun song. It's been filled with some really dated production hooks, though. Oh, the record scratches. What a terrible fit for this song. That was just the sort of thing that got added to songs in the 90s because that's what music producers figured "the kids" liked. I also don't really care for the breakdown in the bridge.

It turns out this is the version that was deliberately punched up a bit for the radio. There was an earlier version of the song that was a little more natural. I agree that version needs some punching-up, and a lot of the choices that were made were the right ones. But they overdid it a bit.

My verdict: Like it. It's fun, it tries to be deep, and there's no faulting their enthusiasm. I'm pleased that Hanson seems to have grown up and honed their craft.

Song #744: "I've Been Thinking About You" by Londonbeat

Date: Apr 13, 1991
Weeks: 1

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This is a polite little dance/pop song from the early 90s, and it's harmless enough. It's got a little bounce that you can dance to, sufficient variety to stay entertaining, and inoffensive orchestration.

I try not to rail too hard against the use of the drum kit in pop music, because honestly I think that combined with sufficient overall sound and clever editing, its sins can be overlooked. Synthesizers are harder to make work, and must be judged on a song-by-song basis. Both these elements work fine in this song. I think it's because it's a dance song, so overall it's expected to be the same throughout a lot of it, and the art is in how variety is injected. And the rest of the music works pretty well. The guitar, the synthesized bass and everything else creates a fairly full sound, with occasional breaks for impact. It never loses its intensity, and it manages to end just before its repetition might get grating.

The vocals might be the hardest part to enjoy. The singer is a weird combination of falsetto and breathy. He sounds like he's whispering most of the time, and I think that's an weird choice. It sounds like he's holding back, either because he's trying not to overpower the music or because he's not very good at singing louder. I don't like the style at all, myself. But I suppose it's not bad enough to ruin the music overall.

The lyrics are about someone starting to think about their friend in a romantic way. "I miss you baby, and I've got those feelings again." It's a decent topic for a song, but these lyrics aren't especially impressive. For one thing, what does "again" mean in that line? Has this happened before? Didn't you sort it out then? Also, the second verse confounds me. He's just confessed his feelings and then it sounds like he's also confessing that he cheated? "She was my one temptation." That sounds like he's confessing to cheating, but how did he manage to cheat in the space between the first chorus and the second verse?

My verdict: Like it. It's got its drawbacks, sure, but it's a light bit of fun dance music and it has its charm.

Song #496: "The Tide Is High" by Blondie

Date: Jan 31, 1981
Weeks: 1

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I'll always associate this song with an ad I saw once for reruns of Star Trek: The Next Generation, which played off the "I want to be your Number One" lyric in this song to promote a week of shows about Commander Riker. That ad cracked me up, but unfortunately it seems the Internet failed to document it for me to share here. Too bad.

I was going to start by commenting on the song's obvious reggae influence, until I discovered it's actually a cover of a song by a reggae band, the Paragons. Blondie seem to play up the reggae style of it a bit more, adding horns and crossing over into ska territory. And I like everything about it. The bass and drum lines are compelling, the horns are appealing, and the strings are used sparingly for accents late in the song.

What I particularly like is the chaotic, mixed percussion through the background. I've often put songs on a scale of relaxing verses energetic, but I think what I really like is intensity. Here's a song that has an overall relaxing tone without losing any intensity, and a big part of it is that the percussion keeps that intensity even when everything else is indicating relaxation.

And just when the song nears the end and threatens to get repetitive, Debbie Harry injects some weird intensity into her vocals to keep the variety coming. The weird intensity of vocals near the end really stands out, but I think it makes the song memorable, and keeps you on your toes, unsure when to expect it.

The lyrics aren't quite so great. It's mostly the same chorus over and over, and the chorus lyrics don't seem to mean much. "The tide is high" is a metaphor that doesn't really get explained. The line "I'm gonna be your number one" doesn't really explain what it means. I guess its meaning is obvious, but the phrase "number one" is so unusual that I'm not surprised someone latched onto it when making a Star Trek promo. And what few verse lyrics there are don't even rhyme, but they're close enough that it doesn't seem like a deliberate choice. "Every girl wants you to be her man. But I'll wait dear until it's my turn." Doesn't rhyme. Heck, the original lyric is "Every man wants you to be his girl. But I'll wait dear until it's my turn," and that doesn't rhyme any better.

My verdict: Like it. The lyrics are easy to ignore, and the overall sound is great.

Song #222: "Wedding Bell Blues" by The 5th Dimension

Date: Nov 8, 1969
Weeks: 3

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Before Marilyn McCoo and Billy Davis, Jr. sang a song from the perspective of a married couple, she sang lead on this song, which really surprised me. Considering I didn't like that song, and I only sort of liked parts of the last 5th Dimension song I covered, I didn't have a lot of hope for this one. But I really like it quite a bit.

I just enjoy the overall sound. There's a classic, classy sound to the music here. I think the focus on piano, with drums, bass, and some horn and string accents, creates an appealingly charming sound. It's energetic and upbeat. I often complain that so many songs in the 70s use so many instruments to create so little sound. This is my counter-example. It uses many of the same instruments that are so popular in 70s pop music, but it uses them to create a full, complete, engaging sound. This is a cover of an earlier song by the songwriter, Laura Nyro, and there was also a cover by Lesley Gore. But both those versions lack the fullness of sound that is present in this version.

Marilyn McCoo really sells this song, too. She belts this one out with enthusiasm, possibly because the song had a bit of a personal meaning to her, since she was engaged to, but not yet married to, Billy Davis at the time. They even had fun with this during TV performances of the song. I think she also captures the right spirit of the lyrics.

The lyrics surprised me a bit, because rarely in pop songs do the singers call out the name of the person the love song is about. Sure, once in a while you'll get a "Sherry" (#78) or a "Sara" (#591), but those are deliberately reflected in the title. I think this song says the name "Bill" more times than either of those, too. Regardless, the singer is trying to figure out if Bill is ready to commit to marriage. And I like the sentiment. She's getting fed up with waiting, and she doesn't want to give up on Bill, but she wants to know if he's going to make the commitment. I suppose you can have your own interpretation of what she'll do if he says no or tries to string her along further. Personally, McCoo's performance makes me think she's going to drop him and move on.

My verdict: Like it. It's charming and energetic, what's not to like?